Retired

"Paris took my heart on the first visit and continues to hold it captive. Early on, I decided that Paris would be my retirement home."

The fantasy over all these last several years has been great, but now I find myself within a few short weeks of the fantasy becoming a reality and a dream fulfilled. This reality in itself opens a whole new world of fantasies filled with new opportunities and more dreams to fulfill. If you know me at all, you know that I am a dreamer.

Rare is the day that is not adorned with some kind of affectionate sentiment from loved ones, though I was hardly expecting the magnitude of attention that came to me today.

Today especially, I am a very grateful, happy man.

Frightening Things

There are a number of things I used to be frightened of that don't bother me in the least now. I now need to think about all I've overcome in my lifetime and take on that monstrous issue that's on my mind.

Affectionate Sentiment

Rare is the day that is not adorned with some kind of affectionate sentiment from loved ones, though I was hardly expecting the magnitude of attention that came to me today.

Decisions

Decisions are experiments. You think you know what will happen, but your guess could be a little or a lot off-the-mark. Bottomline, you're wiser for the exercise.

Nothing Alike

I thought that opposites attract ... in this case they did - opposite sides of the pond, opposite sides of the language barrier, opposite looks, opposite backgrounds - the opposites enhanced the attraction and commitment but then like two magnetic opposite poles attracting one another, over time the magnetic strength weakened and one side decided to not fight and to leave with only one comment - "we are nothing alike".

Friend or Lover

The best romance is a friendship, all dolled up. If you wouldn't be friends with someone, but somehow you love this person still, this is a fine day to come to your senses and either figure out how to be friends or leave!

Be Here

Struggling to get ahead and stay ahead is futile. There is no "ahead", there is only "here". Give up and decide that right where you are now is the perfect place.

Self-Enforced Prisons

Self-enforced prisons are the hardest kind to break out of - and yet you will. And as you do, you'll enjoy freedom in the very area you once associated with suffering - your mind.

Elusive Sleep - My Remedy Has Stopped

Sleep is elusive in Paris ... I can't escape - Paris my remedy has for some reason stopped working for me. Paris was always my place to escape, to recharge, to refuel, to become renewed - This has not been the case on my last two trips. Sleep is elusive - my mind will not stop nor will the angry thoughts that haunt it - the behaviors of old once again taking hold and resonating in my now unquiet Parisian mind.

It's Not the Vessel

It's not the vessel - It's the contents.

Reshaping the vessel is not the answer. God knows I have tried that way too many times - Shape/Size, Shadings (black, white or beige), Coverings (Long, short, rough or smooth), Size (large or small or swollen or gaunt).

Changing the vessel always seemed easier than dealing with the contents. Against better judgement and common sense it was never assumed but always wished. A new vessel would make for better content; but, with sound judgement and common sense one is always left with the truth - It's not the vessel - It's the content.

And now one is left with the fear to crack open the vessel and find what?

Encore

Sitting in Palais Royal, with or without friends, one of my favorite things to do and places to be. The perfect place to sit and reflect - sit, reflect, and obssess - sit, reflect, obsess, and go over all the same repeating themes - at times it is like a classic black and white movie with all it's graininess.

If - What if?

"If" is in the middle of the word "life". Today you can expand your life by asking youself "what if?" - Unless you're looking at all the possibilities, there's a good chance you're running on autopilot!

Some Days

Some days you just wake up in a glowing mood. Others, like this one, require you to take control of your mood by asking yourself questions like "What am I happy about?"

Today my answer is "retirement on the near horizon".

An Intersection

You're at an intersection. Down one road you see hills and valleys and a glorious, but very distant oasis. The other road curves so suddenly you can't see a thing. How adventurous do you feel?

It's Review Time

It's review time, a ritual to take seriously. Go over your victories and mistakes. Put new rules in place that will help you repeat what worked. Leave the negative behaviors in the past.

Expanded Mind

Through reading or listening, you actively expand your mind, one idea at a time. After all, it's the first step in expanding your finances, love life and social network.

Charismatic Speakers

You'll learn from reading and listening to charismatic speakers. Of course, it's what you actually apply to your life that makes the difference. Initiate a good habit tonight - the gesture has staying power.

OK, two interesting and almost scary items are associated with this horoscope - Oprah and Joel Osteen.

Oprah had an entire show on "The Secret" which for some reason appeared on my Tivo (oh that's right, I record it daily). Anyway, there she was with all these "charismatic" speakers discussing the "law of attraction" (something which I have studied and practiced for awhile 30 years ago.

And then there was Joel. Believe me, watching Joel Osteen, the charismatic tele-evangelist or any other religious person is the last thing you would find me doing. However, there I was relaxed on Sunday morning with the coffee and the Times when who should appear at the click of a button - Joel. I took it as a message from God. So I sat up and listened to what he had to say. The message was similar to Oprah's "The Secret" show.

I took both of these simultaneous happenings as a double message from God (the higher power, the collective conscienciousness)as a wake up call for me to get serious again geting positioned to move to Paris. To focus my energy in a positive direction ... to take those necessary steps to jump start that process so I can be where I am supposed to be for the next phase of my life.

Half the Battle

Getting started is half the battle now. If all you do is tackle the first task of a new project, you've won. Establish communication with someone you've admired from a distance.

I Believe

I believe information comes to us when we are ready to receive it. I believe God sends me messages. I believe in a collective consciousness. I believe whole-heartedly that I am sane. You and some of my friends may disagree. However, all that put aside, I have started collecting my daily horoscope and looking for patterns in the message. Call it old age, disparation, lack of anything else to do ... whatever the reasons, this is what I am currently doing while I am stalled on my way to Paris.

A Mark in Time

Today I turned 60 ... I woke up last Sunday thinking about today and what it feels like to be turning 60 – I was surprised to find that it really doesn’t feel like anything other than what it is … a mark in time.

Then I started thinking about the people who have been part of my life and I started remembering little things, places, times about each of them. This led to my thinking of words or phrases that captured indivudal moments in time with each of them.

Tonight to mark this point-in-time, several of friends gathered to celebrate my life and our friendships over many drinks, insane stories and of course, great food.

I took the opportunity to celebrate my love and appreciation for each of them by sharing my thoughts from last Sunday's musings.

C. Pleated skirts - Honey, which one do you like? - You know one leg is longer than the other ... measure each one! - T-Y - Could you just rub some on my back? - Are you finished with that section of the Times? - Just a minute, I know the receipt is here someplace. - Just make them fresh and hot! - Can I have a complimentary cup of water? - Just one wing please. - Don't ask me - I don't want to talk about it - SFS - I love these seats - Did I fall asleep - It's been a long week - Do you like my shoes? - The next zone is just across the street - I love crispy potatoes.

S. Every Saturday for lunch for 20 years - Wake me for the next meal - Clickity Clak, Clickity Clak Gai Shoe GIRLS!!! - Herblax - Shak, Shak, Shak - Who is that girl in the window? - It's your mother! - Your name is Ray? - We'll take both, thanks. - Can you find a place for this? - I'll buy a ticket! - Do you have any duet piano music? - Chattanooga Choo Choo!! - Dont' step beyond the velvet rope! - It's a model apartment! - Look honey, we've had everyone on this rooftop! - Who you gonna call, You know BoBo, event planning in 5 hours! - Honey, can you turn off that light? - Honey, can you pass me that dutch oven? - What is this stuff on this couch? - That's disgusting! - Good day Sailor! - Scarlett and not the color red!.

Bonne Anne 2007

Paris for the Holidays

Paris - December 28 - January 15

Mobile Lifted in the 7th

There I was minding own business in this wonderful cafe in the 7th chatting with my close friend JC when a rude young man bumped into me as he moved to the table in the window. JC, my Parisian friend, was going on about how nice this cafe was when I reached into my zippered coat pocket and found my mobile had been lifted by none other than the rude young man.

JC was incredulous ... I just sat there and thought what an easy mark I was for this kid! Against all good reason, I had thrown my coat over the back of my chair which I never do. I was totally absorbed in the conversation and didn't evern turn around when I was jostled. Something that is also out-of-character for me. A jostle of my person usually results in a stealy stare down. I took it as a lesson learned and also a wake-up call for me that even the most sophisticated city dweller is subject to the assults of the bottom-feeders.

Paris for Thanksgiving

November 22 - 28

Nice in the Fall

Nice October 2 - 14.

Costa Rica in the Spring

Costa Rica May 15 - 27.

Bonne Anne 2006

Paris for the Holidays

Paris December 27 - January 6.

Nice in the Spring

Nice May 16 - May 27

Lost in Time

Not that anyone noticed (my numbers aren't the highest for being viewed by anyone other than myself) but I haven't written one thing during February or March. I feel as though I have been some sort of "Lost in Time" journey. Blame it on the winter blahs or the fact that everyone around me has been either sick, getting sick, getting sick again, or just in a really shitty mood.

So anyway, I turn around and 2 months have gone by without a single word being written. Hopefully, spring will find me more in the mood to write or at least have something going on in my life that is worth writing about. February and March were nothing more than work, home and a serious addiction to reality TV. God what makes it so easy to sit and watch. No wonder my mind is mush!!!

It's bad enough being lost in time but God help me ... I can't afford to be "Lost in Reality TV Space" any longer.

Come on United ... throw me bone with a cheap fare to Paris!!! You're killing me with the $600 plus fares already!!!!

Reality Truly Bites

Yes, it happened to me today around 8:30 a.m. Reality bit me hard and I didn't like it. Work entered my life after 10 glorious, decadent days in Paris. Oh I expected it but I am really never truly prepared for it. So here I am again, reading my recently found expat blogs (NYCa'Paris, La Coquetter, petite anglais) and living vicariously through their daily activitities until I can again return for my quarterly fix.